Pizza Boss Outraged at Penis Size Slur

Pizza chains in Australia are at war over accusations of shrinking pizzas with one chain producing a YouTube video suggesting another chain's pizza delivery drivers have small penises.

Australia’s biggest pizza chain, Domino's, today admitted reducing the size of its pizzas, in response to a similar move by Pizza Hut.

A Domino’s spokesperson said the size change – introduced in May and June this year – was necessary to remain “competitive in the market”.

The Domino’s admission followed an attack by rival Eagle Boys, which recently issued a press release claiming that “some of Australia's large multinational pizza chains have been caught selling smaller pizzas.

“Multinationals like Domino’s Pizza are selling smaller pizzas than Eagle Boys and expected customers not to notice,” said Eagle Boys marketing manager Scott Hamilton.

“It’s disgraceful and frankly un-Australian”.

Domino’s chief executive Don Meij said his smaller pizzas were “in response to our largest competitor Pizza Hut, who changed their size late last year”.

“It is interesting that Eagle Boys has chosen to attack us and not them, considering Pizza Hut instigated this,” he said.

Pizza Hut has declined to comment.

Mr Meij also attacked an Eagle Boys YouTube video which suggests male Domino’s delivery drivers have small penises.




The Eagle Boys video satirises a controversial NSW Roads and Traffic Authority television ad that shows women waving a pinky finger at speeding male drivers.

The RTA ad scorns speeding male drivers as having small penises. See this advert at the bottom of the page.

The Eagle Boys satirical ad is part of a marketing campaign and also appears on an Eagle Boys website.

Mr Meij said Domino’s reserved its right to take legal action over the ad.

“The only unfortunate thing there is that is it degrading to our team members,” Mr Meij said.

“I’m going to write personally to their CEO kindly and politely.

“Look, it’s fair enough that we compete, but why would you want to degrade our team members? It’s nothing to do with them.”

Eagle Boys commissioned what it claims was “independent research” showing its pizzas were now “up to 10 per cent larger than Domino's pizzas.

“In some cases, Eagle Boys' pizzas were up to 3cm larger in diameter or more than 20 per cent bigger in diameter,” the chain said.

It’s unclear if prices shrunk with the size, as pizza prices change rapidly with ever-changing menus and promotions.

Domino's is Australia’s largest pizza chain, last year selling $519m worth of pizzas in its 470 Australian stores. Domino’s is predicting a 25 to 30 per cent increase in profits next year.

"Due to the nature of our pizzas, it was a very small percentage (decrease) of our pizza size," a Domino’s spokesperson said earlier today.







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